April 1st, 2009
Windows 7 includes anti-idiot feature
Microsoft confirmed this morning a new feature installed in Windows 7 Enterprise editions, ensuring the protection and security of the operating system. Dubbed “ProtectOneself”, Windows monitors the activity of the system and prevents certain events from occurring if unsuitable behaviour is detected.
From the latest available build, 7068, you can see from the screenshot below, in true UAC style, how the system works:

I can see how students could benefit from this new feature, as many a time I’ve been to electronically submit an essay or fire off an email, whilst completely plastered. By using mouse movement recognition, similar to previous versions by evening out erroneous mouse moments, and a new keyboard algorithm to monitor slurred writing patterns, Windows can prevent you making mistakes by declaring you a “danger to yourself”.
A Microsoft spokesperson was already having trouble working around this new feature when they turned up to work drunk late yesterday afternoon. She hailed the new feature as “awesome”, just before she passed out.
April Fools…
Zack Whittaker, the youngest in the ZDNet network, is a British student at the University of Kent, Canterbury, where he studies BA (Hons) Criminology and Social Policy. His insight into the next-generation is unique and first-hand, sharing his knowledge of the here and now but more so what's next and how to get there.
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